Friday, January 28, 2005
Those thousands who touched that branded shirt you bought
There are those who cannot live a day without buying that cute Gucci bag or that FCUK coat. Also, there are those who will wilt if they do not have a car.I have learned something important in Sociology class last night. Now, I feel lucky to have grown up in a peaceful and prosperous country. There is no war. The economy is still surviving. I can afford to strut my stuff in the latest fashion designs. I can afford good and tasty food. I can sit in a car, or even drive one. I was taught to appreciate these things and compare myself to the poor people who don't even get enough food in one day. Still, I took many things for granted along the way. And, I am sure all of us had to some point in our lives. Perhaps, it is just human nature, and the fact that consumerism has become part of our daily lives. Well, is it not true that we constantly need new stuff? Getting that new cellphone, that new bag, new car, new house...everything. The case is not so lucky for Russia. Or Nigeria. Or even China.
We watched a documentary in class last night. It showed us the whole process of manufacturing formal coats. I did not know that the wool from sheeps in Australia travelled to so many places in the world before reaching retail outlets. Tags on our clothes such as "Made in Russia" or "Made in China" ought to be appreciated because not many stop to think of the thousands who helped pieced them together for us. When they interviewed some of the workers, I felt sorry for these people who have to work so hard to receive only a minimum wage by the end of the day, just enough for sufficient food to survive. There was this lady worker in China who can only visit her family once a year. She came to the city to work in the factory when her husband fell very ill. They had little money thus she had no choice but to find a job in the city. She said her eldest child was so happy to see her when she returned home, but the little one does not remember her at all.
Poverty is still a very big issue all over. In Russia, the economy is controlled by the mafias. It is difficult to prosper because of that reason. I know I cannot feel the real pain and sufferings of these workers in Russia, but when they interviewed the women who work in the textile factory, I realized that I should appreciate what I have now even more. These women are underpaid. In reality, they are being exploited for their expertise. However, they said that they are contented with what they have. At least, now, they have a job, and their lives now were better than before. During the communist days, it was worse. They had nothing at all. Now, some can afford to buy a television and other appliances because they saved enough during communism in Russia. But they can only watch about the Western items that they cannot afford to buy (for example, toothpaste).
Well, the next time you buy that branded item you see, remember the effort of the thousands who made it for you. At least, it did remind me to appreciate my parents' hardwork to provide me with that comfort, money and food.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
High Frequency of Homework
Everyone loathes homework.Need I say more? :P
Monday, January 24, 2005
Good morning, miss....!
I knew a few seniors who went back to my old school to teach. How did I know this? Well, from me little sister, of course. She is, in fact, still studying in that school. This morning, she told me that my friend was teaching her Chemistry! What a surprise! After that, my sister went offline quite abruptly. I will be nosy if I see her online again :PI tried to picture myself being a teacher. Hmm ... *in deep thoughts* ...
I do not mind teaching math. It is an easy subject to teach. Chemistry ... I have some trouble with that. I know my stuff but I guess it is a little hard to teach Chemistry if you have little or no experience. Anyone can teach English. The only reason why schools are short of English teachers is because no one is proficient enough. I would say, at least, an English teacher MUST speak good english. Writing good English requires lots of self-practice, but you need someone who can speak well to guide you in your speech. My sister said I could teach English when I'm back home for the summer. The school is short of them. Apparently, I would be definitely much better than Mrs. Chan. Haha! We'll see about that ;)
But I have always wanted to teach math. Sometimes, I feel that teaching is what I would like to do. Especially teaching children. That's my true dream job.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Genie
I watched a very interesting documentary in linguistics class yesterday. People have warned me about taking this class. Apparently, the course is difficult and it is hard to acquire that "A". Hey, do I come to university to register in easy courses, which are very often lame, boring, and illogical, so that I can get A's?I find that courses like these are worth it because they question our everyday lives and civilization. Stuff like psychology is interesting. I have never heard anyone said psychology was boring. This course that I am taking teaches us about child language acquisition. Is the ability to learn language innate in us? Is there a critical period of time where we can learn language? So far, I have watched three videos in class, and they have discussed these theories more in depth.
The video that I watched yesterday was based on a true story. Back in the 1980s, a 13-year-old girl was found locked up in a dark room. The girl had been living in isolation for thirteen years in this dark room. She was tied to a potty chair when social workers found her, but according to her mother, she had been tied to the potty chair ever since she was a baby. Needless to say, she could not talk because previously she never had any contact with anyone. Her father was charged for child abuse, but before the police arrived, he shot himself. Her mother was blind and deaf. She admitted that she was a victim of her husband's abusive nature too.
It was shocking. Linguists and scientists named her Genie because they assumed that she never had a human childhood. It was as though she popped out from a bottle into the human world. In the 1900s, a similar case was studied by a famous scientist named Itard. A young boy, about the age of twelve, was found in the forest acting like a savage. He was given the name Victor and was known as the wild child. I believe the movie, "The Wild Child" is still available - I remember watching it on Hallmark). However, Victor's case did not have a happy ending. Itard gave up on the experiment and let the boy live with his servant. Victor died at the age of 40.
When Genie was found, it was another great opportunity for scientists and researches to investigate the case. At the same time, it was a pity.
They taught Genie how to talk, teaching her vocabulary to represent things instead of just pointing with her finger without saying anything. Some were skeptical about Genie's progress because they felt that Genie's brain could have been damaged since birth. They recorded her brain waves when she slept and found abnormal sleep patterns. However, her mental ability to learn was just like a baby's. Each year, she progresses well just like any other baby born into this world.
After two years, Genie could understand other people and talk. However, she was unable to use grammatically correct sentences. We say "what is in the red box?" but Genie would think of it as "what red, blue, yellow the box?"
In the later stages of the experiment, they taught her sign language and she was able to learn it very well. This was probably due to the fact that sign languages were not ruled much by grammar. It was remarkable. However, research and tests had to stop because Genie's mother filed a lawsuit against the research team members on the grounds that they were exploiting the funds allocated for Genie's experiments. A lot of people knew that the team members were not exploiting Genie but they did not have proof to show that they were conducting a real research. They took videos, but they were not labelled, and the reports were not official. Stuff like that. And this was where Genie's life took a change. Social workers had to place her in foster homes because she could no longer stay at the children's hospital.
She was abused in these homes and after living in about 4 different homes, she finally returned to the children's hospital to meet her old friends (the team members) before being sent to the National Learning Institute for the Deaf and Blind in USA.
It was a pity. She was a beautiful child. My teacher said that Genie is still alive. Well, I pray that she will be well.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
How are you today?
"Hi, how are you?""Hey, how's it going?"
I recognize it as a courtesy. It is a divine question. No one ever fails to use it and somehow, it can exist in many different forms. Yes, I am referring to the two questions above. It may seem to you as a common, friendly gesture. However, when everyone uses it to the maximum, I feel that it becomes questionable to whether or not sincerity holds true to these words. I tend to view it differently by catching the tone of the question. One can distinguish sacarsm from truth. On numerous accounts, I have been asked this question hesitantly by those who know me. It is as though seeing me is a pain or an eye sore that they have to reluctantly greet me and ask how was I doing lately. Seriously, don't even bother asking how my day was if you do not want to talk to me or hear from me. I would not even bother asking you the same thing. Not that I despise the person, but we all have our own preferences in making friends, am I right? I would still greet with a "hello".
It is intriguing how this little question can be so much of thought to me. Perhaps, I have had too many negative thoughts lately. Perhaps, I have been meeting too many people with false pretenses. Whatever it is, I was climbing the mountain of thought for the past week, trying to find my way to the top. I did not succeed. Or did I? I do not know. Even if I did, the truth revealed has always been hurtful to some degree.
Sometimes I feel like I am the most lonely person in school. Yet, at times, I feel that I am doing pretty well with my not-so-popular social life. It is all coming back to me again. I had very few girl friends back in high school. I do not know why, but it seems that I am weird or I am deemed "unappropriate" or whatever it is. Sometimes, I wish the truth would just smack me in the face. But still, deep down in me, the fear is there. I am complicated. So complicated.
Now, back to the question - how was my day?
Nothing special happened. No one died. No one fainted. I did not cough in class. Yeap, recovering from my illness. I was hungry again as usual. Lots of homework? Nah, just a few more to go. School has not ended for me because I have a night class today. Not looking forward to it because it is three hours long and I have to walk in the cold to ETLC. Courses are pretty boring this semester. I just cannot wait to get home...home sweet home.
This is my answer. Almost the same everytime. I would say it in different ways, of course. Variety makes life not so dull. But then again, life is as it is. I have no choice but to go with the flow.
Looking back at the past, I realized how stupid I was in many things. It is too hard to list everything down. It would be like telling a lifetime story. Not now, but I will definitely live to the ripe age of 50 or above to tell it. It hurts but lessons in life were never a bed of roses. I wish to keep lots of friendships but somehow, a lot of them let go of it first. Although I still do not know the full truth, I can never forgive myself for being so naive and trusting to those cruel hearts. Everything should be fine now. Judging everything by its cover will only lift your expectations too high. I apologize if I have been babbling too much. You must understand a girl's whirling emotions.
Once, a friend questioned me about my conservative self. He asked me if I was not so adventurous? Well, I do not know if I am or not. But, to some extent, I would say I am balanced out. I would say, even the closest friend of mine does not know my true self. I have learnt that peers influence your interests greatly for a certain period of time, especially when you have no one else to hang out with but that person. However, one will get tired of it sooner or later, and reflect back on their own interests. I have become a victim of my own judgements. I feel like rooting myself to the ground. I feel like flying off to outer space where time will cease to exist so that I can drift away.
After all, I was always finding neverland.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
My voice got lost in a paper cup...
Much to my dismay, I have lost my voice. The coughing has done no justice. It still tries to kill me every night and every time I lay down to sleep. I went to bed at 5 am this morning. Woke up at 1.30 pm with a weird headache. Ugh. I need to see the doctor on Monday.It was "Friday" yesterday - a very happy day for university students as it marks the significant weekend ahead. After school, we headed to the chinese supermarket to do our weekly grocery shopping. It was very cold. Edmonton's notorious winter is back to freeze our toes. Fortunately, we have Jonathan to drive us around.
However, right after shopping, there was a misunderstanding between the Chee brothers. It was an awkward moment in the car because talkative Jackie was not saying a single crappy thing. We stopped at the bubble tea restaurant to get our drinks. Jonathan parked the car and we were deciding if we should take-out the drinks or not when Jackie said he saw a liquor store nearby and got out of the car abruptly. Anyway, the girls (including me) had to be the peacemakers for the night and we told the brothers that they needed to talk to each other and settle their personal problems when they get home. I was hoping that Jackie would not be mad the whole night because then our Friday night's fun will go straight down the drain. And, I would be pissed. Jonathan was fine the whole time. It was Jackie that had the temper. Well, I guess he is much older and more matured compared to Jackie. Boys. Siblings.
Sibling rivalry is very common. A friend of mine commented, "Thank God I don't have any siblings. I only have to face fights with my parents." I thought it was a bias statement to say during the peace-making process. Well, even the best of lovers argue, siblings spat and squabble, animals do fight too...(I don't know about worms)...
It is all common. People are young and tempers flare very so often. But then again, it's an individual preference. Personally, I feel that having a sibling is the greatest gift anyone can have. For me, I have had my share of squabbles with my sister. There were many times where we have both wronged one another. Still, we will and always be sisters. She is, after all, the only next closest relative I have. I cannot imagine growing up without my little sister.
Despite all that, I have always wanted an older brother too. Well, of course I knew it was not possible ever since I came into this world, but this thought have always been with me all these years. It has nothing to do with the pushing the responsibility to the eldest, but it was more of the company. It is difficult to explain...the need for a brother.
Anyway, I don't know what happened to yy last night when we went to HCA to play pool, piano and foosball. No idea, but I was getting tired with the whole silent treatment thing. It was good that the brothers were talking and teasing one another already. If not, I would have just stormed out of the place and go back to my room to sleep. .
Still, it was fun. There's more of it to come during reading week! For now, I have to start gearing up for school. Homework is piling up fast and the semester is going to get crazily stressful again.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Back to school (Winter 2005)
Well, here I am. Back at school again.During the holidays, campus was so empty and all the buildings were closed. Today, it felt good to see huge crowds of students walking around campus again. Ah, varsity life ... what more can I say? Although we all dread squeezing through V-wing at peak hours, I guess we are all quite happy to be back at school.
My classes so far have been pretty good. I have two Chinese professors for materials and electrical engineering courses. They have quite a strong accent, but I have a feeling they are good and dedicated professors. I just dislike the attitude of some people (especially the Caucasians) who think that these kind of professors are crap. Not being able to converse well in English does not mean the teacher is not good. Personally, I think these engineering Chinese professors are the most hardworking and concerned teachers in school.
I am getting ill again. The cough is pretty bad and it hurts my chest. There were also a few weird and depressing incidents that happened today on the first day of school. But, I am thinking it is not surprising after all. I saw it coming at my feet last semester. I just don't understand why. Is there something wrong with me? I would love to think there is something wrong with them but, it does not seem to be heading in that direction.
Don't want to worry anymore. I should think of other important things.
Sunday, January 09, 2005
I'm hungry again
Sigh.School is starting on Monday. I do not know what I am feeling right now. A part of me is looking forward to school because I am so bored at home. Yet, I cannot help but wish for more fun times and hanging out sessions with friends.
I would consider my social life here to be more progressive than life at home. Perhaps, the non-existance of curfew hours contributes to this fact. However, I have to say, shopping sessions back home are way better. This place has only one big mall (apparently, the largest mall in the world). And, it is not that great. It is big because they have big theatres, the waterpark, ice-skating ring and ... you get the picture. The shops are fine. But the fashion here is not very appealing, to me at least.
I just realize something. I tend to overreact when I feel depressed or hesitant, especially when I won't be able to see someone or experience something for a long time. It may seem silly, but I cannot help it. This realization hits me only after I tuck myself into bed. I wish I can control myself and my emotions better. At times, I burst out suddenly, but there are moments where I just bottle everything up and try to put a smile on my face.
Yes, I am hungry again. I seem to get hungry five to six times a day.
Sunday, January 02, 2005
Cold cold cold!
Okay, the weather is getting really chilly. We went to take some pictures at the legislative hall one night but some of us were not prepared for the weather. So, we ended up only capturing a few shots. I had fun this holiday. Spent lots of time with yy, Liana, Jonathan and Jackie. It was a great holiday!On Monday, I have to start looking for my textbooks. Second-hand textbooks...
The university bookstore marks up the prices of these books so much and they keep changing editions every three years, bloody hell. Anyway, it's New Year's Day today. May the upcoming semester not kill! :P
Saturday, January 01, 2005
Happy New Year!
It's a new year ahead!The year 2005...
May it be a warm welcome for all of us who walk different paths in this life.
May it be a peaceful start for nations and people worldwide.
May this year flourish with abundant happiness, health and peace.
The past reminds us of everything that took place in both our sweetest, and darkest hours. But all is never lost forever - may it remind the lost or broken hearts that hope is the greatest gift of all.
Have a happy new year, everyone! May God bless us all and the beautiful Earth that we live in.
about me
Home: KL, Malaysia
School: U of A
I am someone who frets a lot - I call it a psychological disorder. I am constantly trying to escape my complex mind which, very often, drives me and my close companions to the edge of insanity. Born under the sun star Libra, I am greatly affected by a disease called "indecisiveness". Nicknames were never part of my dictionary until I met some people who decided to name me "turtle". Soon, I was representing a zoo of hamsters, "sotongs", pigs, cats, etc...
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