Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Leaving on a jetplane, I will be coming back again haha!
Lalala.Another 15 hours before I leave Malaysian soil. Will be up in the air for ... gosh. Let's not count.
I am excited to go back to school (long holidays with much-to-die-for-food make brain cells go dormant). Then again, I will miss my cosy room, the clean bathroom, the airy living hall and my cute garden at the balcony ... I will miss my sister's wacky weird annoyance. I will miss mum and dad's nagging. The constant chatter and gossip mum shares with me. Dad has been busy with work. Nevertheless, I am grateful he brought us to Melbourne for a short getaway ;)
I will miss the all the food. Oh, I had the most expensive yet delicious lunch ever at Shang Palace at Shangri-la Hotel. Yeap, my aunt belanja me makan! That was a scrumptuos meal.
I will miss the occasional mamak sessions at Mohsin. We always go there because it's close to everyone's home haha. Not forgetting the fun badminton sessions as well. Those silly, lame chattering and jokes with Jess, William, YC, Ryan, and the rest. Too bad I only saw Ken once since he came back. I'm the earliest to leave each year :(
I will miss the shopping sprees here. The hot sun. The thunderstorms. Not the haze, though. I will miss those crazy traffic jams (well my bf drives, not me :P).
I will miss everything that I did for the holidays. The bead classes. New friends. Reunions. I guess with every year, there is always something to look forward to. As they always say, live for tomorrow. Another 8 months and I will be touching Malaysian soil again. And that would be something to live for until the day comes :)
Happy Merdeka Day!
Thursday, August 25, 2005
6 more days
Six more days till my gruelling journey back to Canada begins. It is, like always, very tiring. Just sitting in the plane staring at the video screen is tiring. And I feel that transit hours are there to make people bored (seriously). Ugh.The writing mood did not kick in until this morning when I realized I only have six days left at home. Now it feels as though three months had passed by in a blink of an eye. It is funny how time can influence our immediate thoughts. At times when we feel bored, we think time is walking like a snail. But when are having fun, we think time is running too fast.
Many events, both happy and sad, took place during my summer break here. I still remember the tears he brought to my eyes when he said we should not see each other again. It was depressing as I was blaming myself for being so careless in my judgements, but I was glad that my family constantly gave me moral support then. My trip to Melbourne, Australia, was fun. I enjoyed attending the bead jewelry classes. They were very memorable. The few but crazy girlfriends' session were unforgettable (how silly can we get?). Soon, my good friends from UK were back for the holidays as well. Hanging out with them could never be more relaxing and fun. I missed them dearly. Surprisingly, a certain friendship took a step further as our feelings for one another grew deeper. As usual, I get myself involve at odd times like this. Nevertheless, if there is a chance, and there is still hope, I am willing to let love lead the way.
For now, I am happy. But six more days ...
Suddenly life seems so precious. I feel like stopping time just for the two of us. Then again, I am grateful for this moment in time. Perhaps this is the common love flutters couples feel at the beginning. We will be miles away for another 9 months, and it will be difficult once again. Dad is afraid that I can't concentrate on my studies...like I said, they don't know me well enough :)
We went to the Aquaria KLCC at the KL Convention Center. It was not too bad but I have seen the best at Vancouver, Canada. The tunnel was the most interesting part. I got to see sharks! I love sharks. I mean, I just love to see them hehe. And sting rays too! But the ones I saw in Vancouver were huge.... huge sting rays...it's like...wooow O.o
I guess I will write again on the night before I leave.
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Tagged
Tee hee hee. I got tagged by Teng.Total volume of music files on my PC:
Whoa... I didn't know I had that much songs in my comp O.o
5.19GB; 1,523 songs; 70 folders ...
The last CD I bought:
Jim Brickman's Ballads. I was at MPH at The Curve when I listened to the first song of this album. That song reminded me of a very old, but nice cartoon (Fern Gully) that I watched when I was younger.
Song Playing right now:
Feel Good Inc - Gorillaz
5 songs I listen to a lot, or mean a lot to me:
I don't really have favourite songs. But there are a few which I found very meaningful.
#1 ~ Try a little tenderness by Michael Buble. I like the lyrics. And his deep sexy voice. It's a very unique song; a mix of jazz and sentimental. The song teaches guys how to love a woman. Love is her whole happiness, and you just got to try a little tenderness just to please her :)
#2 ~ Have you ever been in love by Peter Cetera. Just one beautiful love song. It's just so natural and the lyrics sing with so much truth.
#3 ~ Lose Control by Missy Elliot feat Ciara & Fatman Scoop. I like the beat. And that scale thing that keeps playing on and on :P And Ciara's cool (yeah!)
#4 ~ Lydia by F.I.R. I have been listening to this song for quite some time and never got tired of it :) It's a sad song, though. Hehe.
#5 ~ Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson. Her voice is great. And it really portrays how I feel about my life sometimes..."you won't see the tears that I cry, behind these hazel eyes." Fortunately, I managed to overcome my problems with much patience through the years.
Five people to whom I am passing the baton:
Chiak Lung. I want to know more about his taste in songs la.He doesn't like the noisy noisy kind. And I think he likes the lovey lovey kind :P Hehe!
...
Aiyo, truthfully I don't have many ppl who visit my blog, so who else shall I tag leh?
Everyone else la :P ^^
Friday, August 12, 2005
Love me, but don't tell me who I have to be
We decided to watch CAMP instead of Stealth, and I must say, it was nice :)It is not everyone's cup of tea. For those who love musicals, this is a nice simple show. I have never felt so touched by songs before until I watched this movie. It is just something in the way they portrayed youth's trials and tribulations. I would like to share my favourite song from this movie here. The lyrics are meaningful, but it touches deep into your soul if you saw the way the girl sang in the movie. It was beautiful. And she looked beautiful in my eyes when she sang this song ...
Here's Where I Stand
by Casey Donovan
Here in the dark,
I stand before you,
Knowing this is my chance to show you my heart,
This is the start,
This is the start.
I have so much to say and I'm hoping,
That your arms are open,
Don't turn away now won't you hear me,
but you have to hear me.
Here's where i stand,
Here's who I am,
Love me, but don't tell me who I have to be,
Here's who I am,
I'm what you see.
You said I had to change and I was trying,
But my heart was lying,
I'm not a child any longer,
I am stronger.
Here's where I stand,
Here's who I am,
Help me to move on but please don't tell me how,
I'm on my way,
I'm movin' now.
In this life we've come so far,
But we're only who we are,
With the courage of love,
To show us the way,
Unlock the power to stand up and say,
Here's where I stand,
Here's who I am,
Love me and we'll make it through,
Here's where I stand.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
She doesn't understand
"Why? Fall in love already ah?""Don't mess around until you graduate! After you have no heart to study."
When are they going to stop giving me false hope? When I was in high school, puppy love was inevitable, and so I understood why they advised me before. They told me to wait till university. Now I am in university, and they tell me to wait till I'm working. Shit happens, but hey, you can't prevent me from getting hurt all the time!
I am starting to think my parents do not know their daughter well enough. For years, since when did my studies get affected by numerous failures in love relationships? I got my A's. I got the high marks. It's not like I can find Mr. Right straight away when I'm older, and then get hooked, get married, lala li li blah blah ... and finally, happy ever after?
I see no point in complaining about this all the time but I still cannot take my mother's sharp comments. It's not like I'm eloping with the guy overnight. We're just getting to know each other better, and taking things step by step. We have been good friends since. And like I said, shit happens. Feelings come round. It's not like you can burn them instantly and shake it off like salt and pepper.
They underestimate me. Yeah, I am that weak.
What happened to the notion of letting me spread my wings to explore the world on my own?
Hear me now. You can tell me to love myself and be myself but don't tell me how.
Monday, August 01, 2005
Remember Always
I remember reading a very intelligent write-up on life and death. How we remember the living who are famous? How do we remember those who are dead? It was an argument on which leaves a deeper and more meaningful imprint on others. I do not have the article with me now, but I will post it up when I am back in Canada.Recently, a friend's friend passed away. He was the only son. Drowned. Some undercurrent. His father held a deep regret. He wished he had spent more time with his son.
Some may say, perhaps, it was fated. Fated to live only 20 years on Earth. Fated to have him as a son for 20 years only ...
We do take life for granted, be it ours or others. And we realize whom we took for granted only after they've gone. Oh well. That is the circle of life.
This gives me more reason to let him know how I feel. We'll never know what tomorrow brings. We'll never know what will happen in the near future. Spend and treasure every moment with our loved ones. At least, you will live to remember them, and that is the greatest thing you can do for the deceased ... to always remember.
about me
Home: KL, Malaysia
School: U of A
I am someone who frets a lot - I call it a psychological disorder. I am constantly trying to escape my complex mind which, very often, drives me and my close companions to the edge of insanity. Born under the sun star Libra, I am greatly affected by a disease called "indecisiveness". Nicknames were never part of my dictionary until I met some people who decided to name me "turtle". Soon, I was representing a zoo of hamsters, "sotongs", pigs, cats, etc...
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